jesus justice

last week, one of our social service clients were turned away. this is rare, since at Hope Clinic we truly believe in being able to provide for every person in need. for the last three years, she had been coming in for baby formula. the first year, she claimed it "for her twins", and after they turned one, she kept coming, claiming she now had full custody of her sisters' newborn twins. we trusted her as a mother in need, so we continued to fill her demand whenever she came in.

over time, going into the third year that she was coming in for formula, we began to feel uneasy whenever she came in. initially, it was only a gut feeling that could not be merited with any reasonable explanation, so we continued to fill her demand. eventually, we realized that we had never once seen her come in with either sets of her "twins" that she had been supposedly filling this formula for. finally, one day our staff felt like we could not let this go on unaddressed, so after three years, we finally asked her to bring in documentation of her custody over these "twins". since then, we haven't seen her, and it was confirmed that she had been selling the free formula she was receiving from us.

initially, when i heard this, anger for justice raged inside me. "how dare someone take advantage of this system?" "why didn't we address the issue when we first knew her demands were illegitimate?" "why did we let this go on for three years before addressing it?"

as fury was beginning to build up within me and i was hearing this story from the staff member who was directly serving the client, i began to express my fervent concerns of injustice to our system in this situation to her. then, she stopped me to explain something i did not expect to hear, and it left me speechless.

"you know," she began. "i felt the same way too. but as i was praying about how to handle the situation, i realized perhaps this was how God intended for her to provide for her own means during these three years. even though it was not the right thing for her to do, it may have been part of God's plan for her as a means to get by. so in that conscience i could not cut her off. our God is a just God, but His definition of justice trumps ours. just like when he gave israel a king, it was not the right thing per se, but in that moment, God allowed it to happen because he had a greater plan."

whoa. God's justice is greater than our definition of "justice". it was then when i realized that it's not always our job to claim justice in this world... we are often focused on fighting for social justice, for everyone getting their "equal share." but even when the nation of Israel unrightfully asked for a king, he still answered their prayer and provided. and that's the point-- God gave even in times when it was not right. yet He was still fully in control of the situation. He's the ultimate provider, and will provide in whatever ways he wants. in fact, when He provided in the bible, it was often in abundance. maybe sometimes we just need to take a step back, and instead of jumping right in to "fight for justice" and take control over the situation with our own understanding of justice, to simply let God be in control and trust that He knows what He's doing.