Thursday, October 11, 2012

you learn to love someone...

...by learning to serve them. 

it's rarely the other way around. sure, you can serve someone because you love them, but serving gets tiring, and when i get tired, i get grumpy, which means i love less, which means i serve even less. if i was only serving because i loved, then that serving would run out somewhere. if my love for others was conditional based upon how much i wanted to serve them, then over time, i loved less. 

but you see, you grow in your love as you stretch yourself to serve. there have been so many instances in the past year when i didn't love at all. but as i challenged myself to still serve them the best i could as Jesus taught me, i realized that the more i stretched myself to serve them, the more i grew in my compassion and love for them. 

there have been times when the people who got on my nerves the most, the people whom i thought i'd never be able to love or get along with, became friends that i deeply cared for. those friendships didn't start because they started caring for me, but because i made the conscious effort that i needed to begin somewhere. knowing the small heart i had, i even set my standards low by telling myself, "you don't even have to love them. just lend them a hand. give them a lift. just cook them a meal." i knew i couldn't even get to the point of "liking" them, much less, "loving". 

but, strangely enough, as i learned to serve, my love for them grew. 



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